The Scylla and Charybdis of Voting For Democrats

One of the things I see a lot of on the Left is fighting amongst Progressives over the proper reaction to the perennial selling out and betrayal of liberal principles by Democratic politicians whom we elect to office.  Every two years we mobilize on behalf of some Democrats, help to get ‘em elected and then – at some point during their term – find ourselves yelling, “Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!”

It’s like clockwork.

A Long Way to Go . . .

. . . for a very small joke.

 TMAN:                       Dude, tell me that thing again, with the numbers and the countries.

SWELLSMAN:          . . . .   Okay, let’s try this from the top.  First, pick a number between 1 and 10.

TMAN:                       Got it.

SWELLSMAN:          Tell me what it is.

TMAN:                       How is that a trick?

SWELLSMAN:          It isn’t.  But we fucked the trick up the last time we tried so let’s just do a dry run.  What’s the number?

TMAN:                       It’s two.

SWELLSMAN:          Swell, it’s two.  So multiply that by 9, and waddaya got?

TMAN:                       Eighteen.

SWELLSMAN:          Okay.  Now, take all the digits in that last answer and add them together . . . waddaya got now?

TMAN:                       Nine.  One and Eight equals Nine.

SWELLSMAN:          Perfect.  This is the heart of the trick.  Now subtract 5 from your answer.  Waddaya got?

TMAN:                       Four.

SWELLSMAN:          Great.  Now count down the alphabet until you get to the letter that is that number.  So “A” would be “one,” “B” would be “two,” etc.

                                    Got it?

TMAN:                       Yeah.

SWELLSMAN:          Okay.  Now think of a country whose name begins with the same letter as the one you just counted down to. 

                                    Got it?

TMAN:                       Yeah.

SWELLSMAN:          Good.  Now think of an animal whose name begins with the last letter of the name of the country you just thought of.

                                    Got it?

TMAN:                       Yeah.

SWELLSMAN:          Good.  Now think of a fruit that begins with the last letter of the name of the animal you just thought of.

                                    Got it?

TMAN:                       Yeah.

SWELLSMAN:          Good.  It was “Denmark,” “kangaroo,” and “orange,” wasn’t it?

TMAN:                       Whoa.  Not bad.  How’d you do it?

SWELLSMAN:          It’s not hard.  Most of what you are doing when you do this trick is convincing people they have a lot more control over their answers than they really do.

                                    For example, any number between 1 and 10 – when multiplied by 9 – yields a number whose digits add up to 9.  18, 27, 36, 45, etc. etc.  So no matter what you ask the dupe to do, he’ll always end up with 9.  Which means that when you tell him to subtract 5 from “whatever number he’s thinking of,” he’ll always end up with 4.

                                    The fourth letter of the alphabet is “D,” and there are only a few countries that begin with ‘D” – Denmark is the one almost everyone goes with.  Which means “K” is the first letter of the animal, and so almost everyone goes with Kangaroo.

                                    And then “O” is the first letter of the fruit, and so that has gotta be Orange.

                                    The key is to convince the dupe that he or she has any choice in the matter, despite the fact you are funneling him to a predetermined destination.

                                    It is, in its way, a lot like voting.

Thomas Jefferson vs. Lazarus Long

A great deal has been written both in the blogosphere and in the mainstream press about the GOP’s recent adventures in restricting American citizens from exercising their fundamental right to vote.  Of course, the GOP has for years raised phantom charges of “voter fraud” to justify things like requiring voters to present photo IDs before voting . . . despite the fact no evidence of any significant (or even insignificant) voter fraud has ever been presented.  As Bill Maher once pointed out, “We’re America, we don’t vote.  What’s next, you’re gonna pass a law to prevent people from wrongfully showing up for jury duty?”

 

But with the Republican tsunami of 2010 – especially in state races – and as very nicely summarized in this diary by The Troubadour, they’ve since cranked their efforts to restrict voting rights up to Eleven.  And all of these efforts, of course, work to the Republicans’ electoral advantage because all of these measures tend to have the most restrictive impact on minorities, the poor, and college students – you know, groups most likely to vote for a Democrat.

But I’m fairly convinced that this isn’t the only reason the GOP has embraced these vote restriction measures as fervently as they have.  Oh sure, obtaining an electoral advantage by denying your opponent’s supporters the right to vote is nice, but it’s especially nice for the GOP because the Conservative mindset doesn’t believe in democracy.  Instead, the Conservative mindset holds that only the “right sort of people” should be allowed to vote and – coincidentally enough – if you are someone who doesn’t feel like voting for the Conservatives then you, my friend, are not the “right sort of people.”